You know?

Why is it that guys flirt with a girl and when the girl tries to let them know right at the beginning that she is not available and she just wants to be friends, take it as a personal insult and try to act as if they were not interested in the first place and it's the girl's fault for assuming so? We know when they are flirting.. They know that we know.. And we know that they know, we know.. So, why is this so confusing for the guys? I mean, tough luck buddy.. Some lucky guy got there before you did.. So, be a man, suck it up and don't act like it's my fault..

The Good Boy..

So, my beloved had his practical exam today and among the possible combo of experiments that may be assigned, he got an easy one. He manged to breeze through all of them and could've gotten out of the lab early. But does he? No, he stays to help those less fortunate.. How sweet and thoughtful of him you may say.. but I won't 'cos the person he helped so doesn't deserve to be helped.. This person made my beloved's and my life hell in college and he is the most selfish, self- centered, irresponsible *@#**@# I have ever seen and yet my beloved helped him out. When I asked him, why on earth would he do that, he replied, 'I can't see another person in trouble and not do anything about it.'

That was so endearing and yet so maddening.. No wonder I adore that good boy of mine :D

Well, I do have a job now. It's not my dream job but it will do. At least, I'll be able to pay some of my student loan off. So now, I am an online tutor for Biology.

Why am I not feeling good about this? Why do I feel like my life has fallen into a rut? Nothing is new or exciting or fresh and sparkly like it used to be..

The Road Not Taken.

I don't regret having taken the 'other road' but I wish I could find a shelter to rest awhile..

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
two roads diverged in a wood, and I --
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

                                                     - Robert Frost

I just found out that one of those doors is not going to open for me.. I haven't been shortlisted for the JNU job..

Too many options..

I know that having too many options is never a bad thing and for someone who is unemployed right now, that's a truly idiotic thing to say but I applied to some of these jobs months ago and they are just not telling me anything.. I mean come on.. If I didn't get it, just tell me I didn't.. I can't take the waiting.. It's driving me nuts.. If my beloved reads this, he'll chide me for worrying so much.. He thinks the best way to go is to just go on applying and not worry about the results (Very Bhagwad Gita.. My very own Lord Krishna.. Just wish I could be his Arjuna though.. :)) but I don't know.. I just can't do that no matter how badly I want to.. Right now, I'm waiting to know about these positions..

1. Senior Research Fellow at JNU
Applied to this one way back in November..
2. Junior Research Fellow at MLSC
Appeared for the interview on the 12th of December..
3. Tutor at KMC
Interview on 14th of January.. Keeping my fingers crossed..
4. Lecturer in a Medical College at Chennai
Spoke to them over the phone.. Need to go over in person to make the job mine..
5. Online tutoring at TutorVista
Interview on 25th of January..

I know I'm lucky to have so many options open.. But they are still options and I need to know for sure..

Found a bird's nest in my garden today and thought it would be a good addition to my dressing table :D