Saturday, April 18, 2009

As the veil of Nyx falls over me,
I feel myself soar free
Grateful to that efficacious poison,
I sink into blessed oblivion


They tug at his feet and bind his arms
They lie low, plotting and planning, a whole swarm
Dragging a weary body and a mind over which he has no command,
He is grateful to finally feel closing over him, quicksand


Lost in the mountains high
I whisper to myself
This is the way to die

Lost in the desert dry
I tell myself
I shall not try

Lost on the seas high
I console myself
The end is nigh

Sunday, April 12, 2009

If only, that elusive Happiness we could capture,
A special touch, a glance, that rapture..
And then bottle it up, a spirit so fine..
Ephemeral as perfume, as heady as wine..

So that, when the light no longer shines,
That dusty little bottle will still be mine..
That dusty little bottle will still be mine..

My beloved came back today.. It felt so good to gaze at him to my fill, to be with him, to chatter to him and laugh together.. I missed you so much, my beloved.. I wrote the poem above to let you know, I wish those moments we spent together would last forever.. Wish we were not so busy, wish our 'to do list' was not so long, wish we didn't have the pressures of thinking what will happen in the not so distant future, wish the time would stand still for just you and me.. I wish..

Sunday, April 5, 2009

When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
- Coldplay

One of my favorite songs.. I sort of wallow in my misery while it lasts, which is never too long.. But I do tend to listen to Linkin Park, Evanescence and other songs like the one above when I'm feeling low.. Wonder what it is about these songs that comforts me..

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Is killing me..
Boy, I'm gonna die..
A victim of the 'chemistry of life'..

Had my sessional exam today and after reading the lines above, do I even have to tell you that it was horrible.. The people who set the paper seemed to have vowed vengeance against us, for whatever reason.. Anyway, its over and done with now.. Though the fact that I haven't done too well is not letting me relax now..
I'm so much more distracted when I'm studying now than I ever used to be.. I have been with my beloved for over a year now and I'm still as crazy about him as I used to be.. Which is a good thing, except when it distracts me while studying.. But I can't help it.. I'm like a moth to the flame.. And the fact that he was going home today didn't help either.. I spent most of the time I was supposed to be studying in, moping and crying.. He's gonna be away for another week :( Its like God is testing my patience.. To see if this impatient Arien can wait for her love, her life.. I'll show you God.. I'll wait for him as long as it takes.. I'll have to get used to it anyway.. When the course ends, we'll have to stay apart for atleast 6 months if not longer.. All this experience will come in handy then..
Besides, both of us have to really tighten our shoelaces now.. The finals are approaching and if we wanna stay together, we need to work really, really hard.. I hope we make it..